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what the hell is a wedding registry? [Page 1 of 2]

"What the hell is a wedding registry?" grooms will ask, "and why should I care?" The answer to that question causes several different reactions - from the triumphant (free stuff!) to the distraught (I have to shop in how many stores?).   But it's clearly time that grooms started caring about their wedding registry, because there are plenty of goodies to be had.

What's it all about?

There are two main purposes for a wedding:

•  to get married and set things up to live happily ever after; and

•  to acquire all your dishes, silverware, small appliances and other home furnishings for free.

Gift registries facilitate the second point: acquiring stuff. Big stores from K-Mart, Walmart and Target to Williams-Sonoma and Tiffany's and everything in between offer programs where you can pre-select the items you wish to receive as gifts from your guests. This makes gift-giving (and more importantly - getting) very easy. Armed with a little scanner gun, you and your bride will spend a Saturday (!) hunting through one of these stores for dishes, laundry baskets and other "stuff". ("How about an espresso machine?") You add items to your list, and your great-aunt in Nebraska can put away her knitting, go online and buy gifts for you from the registry, with a few clicks. It's too easy.

Well, perhaps this is a slightly simplified explanation, but many modern nuptials have become opportunities for indulgent materialism. One of the primary reasons for this shift must be the gift registry. Gifts have long been part of weddings, but the sheer volume and variety available through the craziness of the Internet often defies the imagination. Isn't this already exciting?!  

The registry, as stated above, can be both a blessing and a curse. At first, it seems like a necessary evil - or rather, a necessary nuisance, but with a quick change of mindset, your registry can become your friend. So, here's why you should grow to like -- wait, no, -- to love your gift registry.

Why do I care?

The first explanation is clearly the easiest: because your fiancée likes it. Remember, anything that she likes, you in turn must like as well. This is a simple rule to follow, and it keeps you out of trouble 99% of the time. She's excited about the registry. You're excited about the registry. See the symmetry there?

Second, and this can't be stressed enough: every item you put on your registry instantly becomes free. You don't buy it, someone else does. It's a truly amazing concept. Of course, if you were shopping only for yourself, you might throw an iPod, a stereo system, and some season tickets into your cart as well, but that's not how this generally goes. The faster you get that through your head, the better off you'll be (however, a bit later we'll show you a few loopholes). Nevertheless, these future presents on your registry - from expensive knives to towels to crock pots to sheets - though far from exciting, are certainly necessary. If you don't register for them now, you will be paying for the dessert bowls, not your Aunt Clarissa.

If all this rampant commercialism doesn't really excite you, you and the Missus can always create a charitable wedding registry. Read more about charitable wedding registries by clicking the link. If not, read on.

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Tue, Nov.24th 2009
My cousin is getting married & I'm one of her bridesmaids. I will end up paying close to $700 for everything from dress & shoes to hair & makeup for the event. Now I'm left wondering how much I should spend on her wedding gift (?!?!?!?!) I was thinking of giving her cash.. What would be a reasonable amount?
Mon, Aug.17th 2009
Well now I know what a registry is aha. He's mean and wouldn't tell me. Hmm we have a some stuff already so we should be good. Maybe an ipod here and there or a Wii haha jk.
Wed, Jun.17th 2009
I dont want all this useless crap we already have. I have fu*&^*g towels, and they dry just fine. I either want to register at a bank or an electronics store. DONT TELL HER IS SAID ANY OF THIS!
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Tue, May.19th 2009
I'm super happy to be getting all this stuff, basically for free. It really does set us up for living together.
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I think this sight needs some work. I mean, realize that you are basing everything on greed. Which I get that is how you keep the company rolling, but help out.
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Thu, Sep.25th 2008
Hi Groom (jul 12th), I don't thinks it's aout being a "stupid male that has to lay down and agree." Instead it's about picking your battles. If there is something that's really, really important to her (like the gift registry) and you don't care any way... it'd be a good idea to smile and agree. Think of it as a compromise: she's happy that you're so agreeable and willing to do it together and you get to pick out things that you like too!
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Since when did the groom have to automatically like what the bride likes. I love my fiancee but I don't automatically just like what she likes. I give her my honest opinion if she wants to know it. I'm not some stupid male that has to lay down and agree to whatever she wants.
Wed, Apr.23rd 2008
Howdy. Great article. I can't say that I enjoyed the six hours we spent in Bed Bath and Beyond registering, however some good did come of it. In return she let me pick out a few things on The Man Registry. That's marriage for ya. You give a lot and you get a little.
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Sun, Apr.20th 2008
hey GroomGroove- i wanted to thank you for becoming one of our newest Wishpot wedding experts. And I wanted to let your readers know that wishpot is a great place to create a registry. With Wishpot you can create one registry with items from all your favorite sites. So you can add that ipod to your registry. In fact our most registered item for weddings is the none other than the Nintendo Wii. What do you think fellas- is that better than a crystal bowl?

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