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[+] considerations for the prospective groom

- gut check: are you  sure you are ready to get married?

- how do i know she's the one?

[+] all the groom needs to know about engagement rings

- a groom's guide to engagement rings

- diamond-buying
guide

- do you need GIA-certified diamonds?

- buying an engagement ring online

- surprise ring or blank check?

- how much should a groom spend on an engagement ring?

- engagement ring price calculator

[+] popping the question

- should the groom ask the father-in-law for permission?

- popping the question

- marriage proposal stories

[+] "pre" marriage things

- the prenuptial agreement

- pre-marital counseling

- pre-marital financial planning

a second marriage for the groom?

engagement announcements

the engagement party

dealing with cold feet or wedding jitters

dealing with bridezilla

eloping

a las vegas wedding

the name change: sometimes touchy

backing out of your wedding: a survival manual

your fiancée called off the engagement

tax consequences of getting married

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getting over wedding jitters[Page 2 of 3]
What about "Fear of Commitment"?

Get over yourself. We at GroomGroove.com think that "fear of commitment" is just an excuse for guys who are always looking for the next best thing. Sexual variety, not being tied down and the ability to pull the emergency parachute are all great features of bachelorhood, but they also reflect the fears of 20 year-old college kids worrying about limiting their options in the dorm. The only exception, we believe, is in the case of guys who've been divorced or seriously jilted.

Stress Relief

Ware off nervousness by going for a run, hitting the gym or hitting some golf balls. Ever done yoga? Whatever it is that cuts through stress for you, is going to help. For example, if you're stressed out about work, that's going to have an effect on your relationship ad your outlook on your impending nuptials.

Where the Best Man Comes In

Your best man is supposed to be your confidant. He's the guy who you should go speak to if you've got cold feet. Be honest with him and he'll give you the straight goods on whether you're being totally irrational or have a valid concern. Don't exclusively consult the man in the mirror, as you're not likely to be in the best position to determine whether or not you're being irrational! Put well-earned faith in your best man and trust his judgment. If it's not your best man, it's a brother, father or a even a professional counselor. Each of these people can help you work through exactly why you're feeling this way. Says recent groom, Ryan Bater, of Santa Monica, California: "I distinctly remember having a conversation with one of my groomsmen the night before the wedding.   I was expressing some underlying concern at what I was about to do. There's not doubt he calmed me down, and made me realize that I was freaking out just as much about the really big day ahead as I was about marriage itself." article continues...
[Page 2 of 3]

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Matt
Mon, Feb.8th 2010
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This is to DEE. I'd ask him if he wants to get married or not. Be completely honest and don't guilt him into a response. Truely (sp?)let him answer and find out what the problem is. If he doesn't want to get married, it's better to know now then getting divorced 2 years down the road.
Dee
Sun, Feb.7th 2010
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I've been with my fiance for 5 years. We're getting married in 2 days and I've noticed that he's being more distant, moodier, and a bit mean the closer we get to the day. This is making me get cold feet -never mind him! I don't know what I should do about this. I think he is more concerned about looking stupid in the eyes of others since he's already told everyone important to him that he's getting married. I also think that maybe he is weighing the options of "marry her or loose her." Any advice?
SARAH
Wed, Jan.6th 2010
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i have been with the fiance for over 7 years. We have lived serveral different places throught out our time together.we recently purchased our first home this past Aug. 2009 we had been engaged since Feb 2009. Just recently he informed me that at times he cant picture us in the future. He wants a future and he loves me but has a hard seeing us. I want to be his wife to love and cherish him for as long as i shall live, but what does this mean. is it coldfeet, realizing that you are about to committ your life with someone. or is it something more then just coldfeet. I am at loss of words right now.
Mon, Dec.28th 2009
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Your Comments
Mon, Dec.28th 2009
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Your Comments
Melanie
Wed, Oct.21st 2009
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My fiance has been my bestfriend for 10 years and has wanted to marry me for all 10 of those years. We have been dating 4 years and he proposed 8 months ago. He woke up one day, acting funny and I asked him what was wrong, and he told me that he did not think he could marry me. He said that something does not seem right, and he needs to figure it out. But he does not have any answers to anything that I ask him. Everytime I ask him, why he feels that way, he says he does not know. He went to a counselor once, and I am hoping that we see a couples counselor. He is acting like a completly different person, then the guy that I have known for 10 years.
Shelby
Fri, Jul.17th 2009
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WOW! I am going through some crazy stuff with my new (2 months) fiancee already and I am truly concerned. I get the feeling I'm planning something that might never happen. He has a new excuse everyday as to why we should wait, or why we aren't ready to get married. Some of his reasons are valid, but at times it just sounds like excuses. (This man wants me to take a lie detector test to prove I've never been unfaithful. Meanwhile I've caught him communication with other women on several occasions.) Why did he propose to me if he wasn't sure. Part of me wishes I had the strenght to just walk away now, before I end up a bride who gets left at the alter. I don't know! He has been a commitment-phobe during our entire relationship and I hung in there because I love him. I am going to try to get him to read this article although I'm not sure it will help.
Sat, Jun.13th 2009
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Your Comments I am 59 engaged to man 62 and we decided to marry 2 months after meeting, spent evey day together. Three days before our wedding ws to take place - a small wedding in my son's home, I came over and walked into the room with family members there and him saying he was not going through with it. I had an asthma attack and had to go to the hospital. I was so stunned that he would not call, or tell me in a setting that would be easier and more respectful to me. He had been given a diagnosis of multiple sclerosis two weeks before and I didn't break it off. I gave in to his wanting us to live in the house he and his deceased wife lived in, even helped him 'stage' the house for sale - he said it is to big for him alone and for us as a couple, and I helped him set his doctor appointments and MRIs. He had to have a foot surgery (minor) because he had neglected his health and feet and teeth. I thought I was doing what he wanted. He is losing his ability to walk, etc. But, I am a mature adult and was not interested in anything but him ... he has money and paid for house ... a prenuptial and separate accounts are fine with me. His sons got worried that if the house sold, and he purchased new home (near them and something they had tried to get him to do) and he was married to me and he died they would not inherit. Sunday before the Wednesday he broke it off, he made a strange comment "I am bringing a lot into the marriage and you are not ... I have guitars that are worth thousands of dollars." I started to break it off then with him ... I don't care about the money.... I am college degreed (he is not) and certified legal mediator, speech therapist, educator, tech writer .... I am currently on disability after an accident and private disability will be almost $3000. He has a pension and soc sec disability - total $5000. His kids kept saying it is too quick. He set the date. We were becoming very emotinal invested and he proposed. His wife died a year ago ... I was hesitant at first to get involved, thinking he was not ready; but, he said he was ready. I don't know what to think - it has been two weeks. I asked him not to call me and now I just want to go over there and ask "what happened?" but, I have not because of the embarrssment factor. For the first day or so, his family was camped out at his house. I don't know how long he can live alone because of his diagnosis. His daughter-in-law said he had 'cold feet' - the one who was not there that day when I walked in. She said he is refusing to take the meds.
Jessica
Wed, May.20th 2009
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Your Comments I was engaged and now he has postponed everything. He took the ring back and I don't know what to do. I think everything hit him when we were going to meet with a architect. Why didn't he bring any of this up before? Am I suppose to wait for him to figure out what he really wants or just move on?
Mark
Wed, May.20th 2009
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Sarah, Your husband doesn't love you. Don't bother with this advice, it won't help you in the end. If he is nervous and pulling back, he's not in love with you, and doesn't want to go through with it. Just accept it and move on. Honest advice from a guy who is going through the same thing.
Sarah
Tue, May.19th 2009
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This article is great, now how can I suggest that my fiance read it without offending him??? We are supposed to be married in 4 days and he's suddenly flipped out on me!

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