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[+] "pre" marriage things

- the prenuptial agreement

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a second marriage for the groom?

engagement announcements

the engagement party

dealing with cold feet or wedding jitters

dealing with bridezilla


a las vegas wedding

the name change: sometimes touchy

backing out of your wedding: a survival manual

your fiancée called off the engagement

tax consequences of getting married

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getting over wedding jitters[Page 1 of 3]

Got cold feet? Congrats! You can consider yourself 'normal'. Nearly every groom gets wedding jitters at some point during their engagement (and often close to wedding day). It's a perfectly acceptable reaction to the creeping realization that you're making a huge, lifelong commitment to the institution of marriage and to another person. Here's some advice for grooms to help quell a (hopefully) minor case of cold feet.


Last-minute emotional rushes can be overwhelming for even the most steadfast of grooms. Don't be surprised by a sudden feeling that you're headed downriver without a paddle, and with a waterfall at the end. The good news is that you are in good company. Grooms are likely to ponder - in even the best of circumstances - whether they are making the right choice, particularly with the divorce rate being so high. Jitters, of course, vary in degree. While men have long been accused of lacking emotional sensitivity, there's no doubt that we have emotions, and nerves are one of them. If it isn't apparent from your tone, your sweat glands may even do the talking for you.

Rational thoughts

But for every bout of nervousness, men are also often counted on for strength and rationality. Whether or not you are the strong and cool-headed type, allow a dose of rational thoughts enter into your mind. The key is to figure out exactly why you're a bit nervous. Don't avoid deep reflection. Long ago you decided to marry your girlfriend, whether you thought she was "The One" or the "woman of your dreams", or just the most compatible person for you. If you had felt that this was an arrangement destined for failure, you would have known long before making the marriage proposal. So what is getting your goat?

If it's a concern about compatibility, you've got to remind yourself that no one is perfect, and focus on the positive, not the negative. Focus on the honeymoon, great times ahead, a free set of knives, retirement and the little children your marriage will produce (!). Think of all the positive reasons to marry your fiancée, rather than focusing on flaws in your relationship, yourself or your fiancée. It's also a good idea to remind yourself that the flaws in your relationship are likely much less minor than the next persons'! article continues...
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Fri, May.1st 2015
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Sat, Mar.28th 2015
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Thu, Mar.26th 2015
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Tessy Cole
Sun, Feb.22nd 2015
My name is Tessy Cole from Finland, My boyfriend left me a month ago and he was leaving with another woman who is 5 years older than him, i felt like my life is completely over so one day as i was browsing searching on the internet for help I read over the internet how a spell caster who has help several people to get there love back. I have been depress for the past one month and what i needed is to get him back and live with him happily. So, i decided to give it a try so i contacted the spell caster called DR. EBAKOR and i explained my problems to him and he said he will cast a love spell for me that will bring him back forever. I had no choice but to inform DR. EBAKOR to cast the spell which i use to get my boyfriend back and now my life is complete and both of us are very happy with the relationship. And i am really grateful to this man for what he has done for me and my family, Thank you very much and i will continue to say and share my testimony over and over again. For those who need help or that are having the same problem or other wise as me should contact him on his email address; DOCTOREBAKORSPELLTEMPLE@HOTMAIL.COM You can also reach him on his cell phone: +2348136047017
Fri, Jan.30th 2015
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Marisa Saenz
Sat, Dec.13th 2014
My name is Marisa Saenz i want you all to join me to thank the great man that help me to restore my relationship with my husband who dump me for another Girl for 3 months because the Girl had money, at first i never believed Doctor Azul spell temple will be able to help me win Nelson back from this other Girl but because i still love him and i need him back in my life, i worked and follow his instruction and it surprise me that after working with him, Nelson called me and ask me to forgive and forget the past that he still love me and that was how my husband came back for good. So with this great work done for me by Doctor Azul spell temple of whom i promise to always share his good work to the whole wide world and if any body is out there passing through any relationship difficulties should kindly contact him via Email { Azulspelltemple@outlook.com }. Once again thank you Great Doctor Azul...
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Sat, Nov.15th 2014
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Mon, Oct.6th 2014
Your CommentsI am here to give testimony of how i got back my husband, we got married for over 9 years and we have two kids. thing were going well with us and we where always happy. until one day my husband started to behave in a way i could not understand, i was very confused by the way he treated me and the kids. later that month he did not come back home again and he called me that he want a divorce, i asked him what have i done wrong to deserve this from him, all he was saying is that he want a divorce that he hate me and do not want to see me again in his life, i was mad and also frustrated do not know what to do,i was sick for more than 2 weeks because of the divorce. i love him so much he was everything to me without him my life is incomplete. i told my sister and she told me to contact a spell caster, i never believe in all this spell casting of a thing. i just want to try if something will come out of it. i contacted traditional spell hospital for the return of my husband to me, they told me that my husband have been taken by another woman, that she cast a spell on him that is why he hate me and also want us to divorce. then they told me that they have to cast a spell on him that will make him return to me and the kids, they casted the spell and after 1 week my husband called me and he told me that i should forgive him, he started to apologize on phone and said that he still live me that he did not know what happen to him that he left me. it was the spell that he casted on him that make him come back to me. my family and i are now happy again. Thank you Dr. Aluta for what you have done for me i would have been nothing today if not for your great spell. i want you my friends who are passing through all this kind of love problem of getting back their husband, wife , or ex boyfriend and girlfriend to contact traditionalspellhospital@gmail.com and you will see that your problem will be solved without any delay.
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Wed, Aug.13th 2014
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Tue, Aug.12th 2014
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My boyfriend of 2 years just left, no note, no text, no explanation, I was in pieces, I contacted Prophet Osaze and within a few minutes of talking to him i felt much better, he is so calming, i listened to his advise and he began work for me and it worked within 48 hours and I can't thank him enough.I would just like to say that Prophet Osaze really does do miracles, my soul mate came to quicker than I thought he would. I would recommend him to any-one who needs help, and I will use Prophet Osaze again for further work in the future. You can contact him on spirituallove@hotmail.comYour Comments
Tue, Dec.13th 2011
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to mary
Tue, Aug.17th 2010
I would find what the belief is that is causing the fear. Identify what is causing the fear, then see if the evidence stacks up.
Fri, Aug.13th 2010
Alright, I am getting married next month (September) and I am scared out of my mind. I have been with this guy for almost 11 years. I love this guy to death and I see myself with him in the future. This guy is absolutely perfect, he planned the whole wedding out, including the honeymoon to Thailand and Bali, without my help. He told me to sit back and relax while he does everything because he wants me to be stressed free. I love this guy but I don't know why I am so nervous. Anytime when someone mentions about the wedding I get really dizzy and look for an exit. Recently, we went to file an application for marriage and I couldn't sign the dam paper. I had to make sure with him that it wasn't official when I signed it. Anyways, I am really really really nervous. Please HELP!!!! Should I cancel or go through with it?
Wed, Jul.28th 2010
I was going to get married. My boyfriend proposed and we were making plans - but 3 weeks passed and I could not see any action - i asked him what was wrong - he said he was a bit scared and all of a sudden evetyhiing we discussed before was not such a good idea. I was so hurt I could not handle it - so i lef thim. He did not even make an effor to keep me and he is not contacting me it has been 10 days. Was I right? Or the fact that he is not contacting me shows that he was never serious about. I want some men's opinion please.
Me 2
Mon, Jul.12th 2010
Has anyone experience cold feet after getting married and the honeymoon? I'm so in love with my wife, yet I am almost more terrified of marriage after we got married than before. Any similar issues? Any advice?
Sun, Jun.20th 2010
I have been with my boyfriend for 3 years and today after I suggested we come up with a number and work towards saving that amount to get married, he got angry and told me he didn't want to marry me and it will never happen....what should I do? I felt as though someone cut my heart open...I'm in love with him and I don't understand why there's always a debt or bill to pay off first? Are these logical reasons or excuses...the family doesn't care for me either and he's more concerned about his credit being messed up...am I a fool or is it normal for a guy to want to marry or not marry me based on my credit score!? seriously? I am hurt and lost...
In Georgia
Mon, May.3rd 2010
My fiancee and I have been together for almost three years. He is now starting to pull up old issues and arguments and wanting clarity on them ALL of a SUDDEN! I am confused! He stated that he wants to work on all of our issues before we enter into marriage and become a divorce statistic. His most bogus statement was saying that we won't be able to have a honeymoon because who knows when he will lose his job! His job isn't even threatened. It's just yet another excuse---he didn't want to do a cruise for our honeymoon, then I convinced him that it was a fun idea, then agreed to go but he didn't want to be gone for too long and take 'too much' time off of work. I tell ya! I have cancelled the wedding thus far. I know that he has cold feet. I don't. I'm ready to be a wife! Oh well. I will see what happens.
Thu, Mar.25th 2010
i have been with my fiancee for 8 yrs, we moved in together about 3 yrs ago and things have been great! We have such a blast together and are best friends! We got engaged just about a year ago and have a wedding set in 6 mths. about a month ago, he tells me hes not sure if getting married is the right thing for him right now. he says hes scared to get married, etc. pretty much all the classic wedding jitters stuff.he says he loves our life here the way it is now and wonders why we need to get married. it seems hes scared of the piece of paper. he says that the whole idea of the "finality" of getting married. he said he needed time to figure out if he really wants to go thru with this. he started sleeping in the spare bedroom b/c he thought that if he was away from me at night, he'd miss me and feel better. well, we got into an argument about 2 weeks ago and i asked him to leave home for a couple of days. i did it with the intention of him missing home too much and want to come back and get married. well, long story short, he wants to come home but is still unsure about getting married. i want him to come home badly; i miss him more than words can express, but i don't want him to come home and go back to sleeping in the spare bedroom and us being on our "break" till he figures things out. i only want him to come home if and when he's ready to commit and get married! in the meantime, all of our wedding planning is on hold until we can figure this whole mess out. we're even talking about calling all the vendors and calling the whole thing off! am i doing the right thing? should i tell him to come back home even if hes not ready to say lets get married or should i let him sweat it out? i don't know what the right thing to do here! i love him more than anything and want to marry him but i don't want to marry someone who doesn't want to be married! Please, I'm desperate here! any suggestions would be helpful.
Thu, Mar.18th 2010
I've been with my boyfriend for 6years. The first years togeher we were always together,going out and having fun..as the years move by..he got this different job and it made it that he wa working all the time. Evening and weekend even when we didn't have to.THat caused some problems but with time i got uste to it and i accepted it. As the years move my at least as he wasn't spending time with me at least he was home. Now, the past year..he's working more but he makes time for everyone else..i keep finding myself alone almost every night. At least one night a week he goes out and doesn't come back to sleep. THe other nights he's either out or if he is home we're in different rooms and even if we are we barely talk..it's liek our conversation is running on low. Alot of the time if we are together we end up having fights or the stupiest subject..and i can't even figure out the why....I'm somewhat noticing that i am always alone, that we don't talk, that everythin i like to do as activities he dislikes, music i like he doesn't like, we dont see most things eye to eye.I'm also noticing that i need to be with someone that actually wants to spend time with me, that shows affection...I know alot of guys don't show affection..but is it crazy to want to know that your fiance actualy care. That he wants to stay home sometime to actually spend some time with you..or gets intersted or involved in compromising and trying to get interestd in doing some stuff i might like..Not insulting peoples or things i like to do.. I always knew he didn't like some of the stuff i like..or he hasn't chaged that much in the fact that he is always gone..it's just worst now. Am i just scared in getting married..cause i'm just scared as normal wedding jitters...or am i scared cause my back in against the wall..i'm getting married in 4months and realising that where very different..and iwant someone a partener that wants to spend time with me.......which one..is it..how to figure which is which... I talk to him about him always being gone..and he knows that it's true..and he said i should ask him to make plans..which is true..but it's like i have to save a day 2 weeks in advance..is that normal? Is it normal to have sexual relationship to months between each to not showing affection..but whe i talk to him i know he loves me and he shows me then..he keeps saying he'll change and work on it..but unfortunetly i've heard this too many times during our 6years..do i believe he can change..or will he goes to his old ways? I'm really confused as the "what" to do..i know i love him..i do..but is that enough? how to know if it's enough..how to know if it's jitters or theses problems are more serious? Thanks for time and i'll b waitting for some advice... danielle
Sun, Mar.14th 2010
This is for ASH. Find out exactly what makes him scared about the wedding. I almost called my engagement off because I was too scared to proceed. But after me and my fiance discussed my concerns, I found out there wasn't anything to be afraid of (besides typical cold feet stuff). Hold a "summit" so to speak. Let it be a talk where nothing is off limits to talk about and provide unvarnished answers, from both of you.
Tue, Mar.9th 2010
so my boyfriend and i have known eachother since we were children but only recently to grt engaged and weeven set a date. we picked out the ring and he picked it up, but now he says he's too scared and wants to slow thing way down almost to a hault.He says he loves me still wants me to live with him and for me to be his wife (eventually). What should i do i don't want to end up being a perma girlfriend?
Sat, Mar.6th 2010
My partner & I have been going out for 5 year this year and have been living together, in various places. My old man is very christian based and can be judgemental most of the time, towards us and living together before marriage. Few months after I my 21st i had a mental breakdown anxiety depression experienced a spiritual attack, + family seperated and a demanding prick of a boss standing over me at work wasn't helping and a few other things triggered etc and spent a few days in hospital, around that time he had been sleeping in another room saying that he had a bad back which he does have but that our bed in too hard, when more it was about respecting my dads wishes rather than our thought and views and thats personal and we live with that. Last year he was still sleeping in the other room, and I felt we were drifting apart. Tried to tell him that sleeping together was an important element of our relationship but all he could see was that we were going to sleep and does really matter, and that heaps of people he knows do the same and i should get over it, it wasn't a big deal. So I would go spend more time with the girls, and we caught up. Group of girls get harrased by men and one did try make his move but I was not at all interested so I left.. When I tell him what happened he thinks I was out to cheat on him. So about a fotnight later he proposes to me, which now we look back he properly does one day but think it was more to keep me, for me to know he's in for the long hall. So from after that he's back sleeping with me and everythings rosey.. He goes to ring up my dad for his blessing, but dad was more stunned over the phone and suggest he should drive to his house and ask in person. I even organised a meeting for all three of us to discuss and dad brough a friend, so we had even sides and he was more likely not to loose his cool. Which didn't really change anything. My partner asked me to take of my engagment ring, sorted like he was calling it off without me, too hard to please future in laws. So now I'm stuck everyone is expecting us to be planning our day, My feelings towards him havn't changed, we shouldn't have to cancel everything because my old man has issues and is old fashioned. My partner told me that I had to work out my dads blessing on my own without him, so this I did i caught up with him and told him that things were still going ahead eventually. It doesn't have to be this hard, for a start it none of my old mans business he can keep his views to himself. My partners lot he's desire for marriage and can't be bothered with my old mans crap, why should that change anything, this is ment to be a happy time for us, we had the engagment ring, venues booked but now it just feels like i'm draft organising our big day and that i'm forcing him into marriage too quickly.. when all i said was yes! Were both christians but he can't see god created marriage and that its nothing more than a piece of paper. By the way he's 31 I'm 23.. all my friends are having kids and getting married makes it so fustrating when were/I'm trying to move forward. comment to my email - sugarieexox@hotmail.com
Lost right now
Sat, Feb.27th 2010
I have been engaged for 1 year 9 months, I never pushed to be married or engaged it was a total surprise when he poped the question. Right now we are in the crunch time period with only 3 months to go. He recently came to me and said hes not ready to be married. He said he thinks if he was ready he would be really excited to be planning and doing things to get ready for the wedding and hes not. He said he loves me and in love with me. Is this cold feet or hes just not that into me?
Mon, Feb.8th 2010
This is to DEE. I'd ask him if he wants to get married or not. Be completely honest and don't guilt him into a response. Truely (sp?)let him answer and find out what the problem is. If he doesn't want to get married, it's better to know now then getting divorced 2 years down the road.
Sun, Feb.7th 2010
I've been with my fiance for 5 years. We're getting married in 2 days and I've noticed that he's being more distant, moodier, and a bit mean the closer we get to the day. This is making me get cold feet -never mind him! I don't know what I should do about this. I think he is more concerned about looking stupid in the eyes of others since he's already told everyone important to him that he's getting married. I also think that maybe he is weighing the options of "marry her or loose her." Any advice?
Wed, Jan.6th 2010
i have been with the fiance for over 7 years. We have lived serveral different places throught out our time together.we recently purchased our first home this past Aug. 2009 we had been engaged since Feb 2009. Just recently he informed me that at times he cant picture us in the future. He wants a future and he loves me but has a hard seeing us. I want to be his wife to love and cherish him for as long as i shall live, but what does this mean. is it coldfeet, realizing that you are about to committ your life with someone. or is it something more then just coldfeet. I am at loss of words right now.
Mon, Dec.28th 2009
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Mon, Dec.28th 2009
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Wed, Oct.21st 2009
My fiance has been my bestfriend for 10 years and has wanted to marry me for all 10 of those years. We have been dating 4 years and he proposed 8 months ago. He woke up one day, acting funny and I asked him what was wrong, and he told me that he did not think he could marry me. He said that something does not seem right, and he needs to figure it out. But he does not have any answers to anything that I ask him. Everytime I ask him, why he feels that way, he says he does not know. He went to a counselor once, and I am hoping that we see a couples counselor. He is acting like a completly different person, then the guy that I have known for 10 years.
Fri, Jul.17th 2009
WOW! I am going through some crazy stuff with my new (2 months) fiancee already and I am truly concerned. I get the feeling I'm planning something that might never happen. He has a new excuse everyday as to why we should wait, or why we aren't ready to get married. Some of his reasons are valid, but at times it just sounds like excuses. (This man wants me to take a lie detector test to prove I've never been unfaithful. Meanwhile I've caught him communication with other women on several occasions.) Why did he propose to me if he wasn't sure. Part of me wishes I had the strenght to just walk away now, before I end up a bride who gets left at the alter. I don't know! He has been a commitment-phobe during our entire relationship and I hung in there because I love him. I am going to try to get him to read this article although I'm not sure it will help.
Sat, Jun.13th 2009
Your Comments I am 59 engaged to man 62 and we decided to marry 2 months after meeting, spent evey day together. Three days before our wedding ws to take place - a small wedding in my son's home, I came over and walked into the room with family members there and him saying he was not going through with it. I had an asthma attack and had to go to the hospital. I was so stunned that he would not call, or tell me in a setting that would be easier and more respectful to me. He had been given a diagnosis of multiple sclerosis two weeks before and I didn't break it off. I gave in to his wanting us to live in the house he and his deceased wife lived in, even helped him 'stage' the house for sale - he said it is to big for him alone and for us as a couple, and I helped him set his doctor appointments and MRIs. He had to have a foot surgery (minor) because he had neglected his health and feet and teeth. I thought I was doing what he wanted. He is losing his ability to walk, etc. But, I am a mature adult and was not interested in anything but him ... he has money and paid for house ... a prenuptial and separate accounts are fine with me. His sons got worried that if the house sold, and he purchased new home (near them and something they had tried to get him to do) and he was married to me and he died they would not inherit. Sunday before the Wednesday he broke it off, he made a strange comment "I am bringing a lot into the marriage and you are not ... I have guitars that are worth thousands of dollars." I started to break it off then with him ... I don't care about the money.... I am college degreed (he is not) and certified legal mediator, speech therapist, educator, tech writer .... I am currently on disability after an accident and private disability will be almost $3000. He has a pension and soc sec disability - total $5000. His kids kept saying it is too quick. He set the date. We were becoming very emotinal invested and he proposed. His wife died a year ago ... I was hesitant at first to get involved, thinking he was not ready; but, he said he was ready. I don't know what to think - it has been two weeks. I asked him not to call me and now I just want to go over there and ask "what happened?" but, I have not because of the embarrssment factor. For the first day or so, his family was camped out at his house. I don't know how long he can live alone because of his diagnosis. His daughter-in-law said he had 'cold feet' - the one who was not there that day when I walked in. She said he is refusing to take the meds.
Wed, May.20th 2009
Your Comments I was engaged and now he has postponed everything. He took the ring back and I don't know what to do. I think everything hit him when we were going to meet with a architect. Why didn't he bring any of this up before? Am I suppose to wait for him to figure out what he really wants or just move on?
Wed, May.20th 2009
Sarah, Your husband doesn't love you. Don't bother with this advice, it won't help you in the end. If he is nervous and pulling back, he's not in love with you, and doesn't want to go through with it. Just accept it and move on. Honest advice from a guy who is going through the same thing.
Tue, May.19th 2009
This article is great, now how can I suggest that my fiance read it without offending him??? We are supposed to be married in 4 days and he's suddenly flipped out on me!

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