home > the engagement > a groom's guide to engagement rings

[+] considerations for the prospective groom

- gut check: are you  sure you are ready to get married?

- how do i know she's the one?

[+] all the groom needs to know about engagement rings

- a groom's guide to engagement rings

- diamond-buying

- do you need GIA-certified diamonds?

- buying an engagement ring online

- surprise ring or blank check?

- how much should a groom spend on an engagement ring?

- engagement ring price calculator

[+] popping the question

- should the groom ask the father-in-law for permission?

- popping the question

- marriage proposal stories

[+] "pre" marriage things

- the prenuptial agreement

- pre-marital counseling

- pre-marital financial planning

a second marriage for the groom?

engagement announcements

the engagement party

dealing with cold feet or wedding jitters

dealing with bridezilla


a las vegas wedding

the name change: sometimes touchy

backing out of your wedding: a survival manual

your fiancée called off the engagement

tax consequences of getting married

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a groom's guide to engagement rings [Page 1 of 3]

So, fearless man who is getting serious, the time has come for you to pop the question. If you're thinking of going down on one knee and asking her to marry you in the traditional way, you'd better have the engagement ring handy. You'll be surprised to know, however, that much in the way of marriage proposals has changed over the past decades, and in lockstep, so too have the options when it comes to engagement rings. This is a good place to start learning.

While it's becoming more popular for couples to decide to become engaged in an off-hand manner and then venture down to the jeweler to choose the engagement ring together, many women still feel there's something special about wearing a ring that their beau has chosen especially for them. Accordingly, you'll want to make the right choice when it comes to an engagement ring.

Making the Right Choice of Engagement Ring
Before you can even consider looking at rings, you need to find out a few basic things about engagement rings in general, but most importantly, the potential preferences of your girlfriend:

- What is her ring size?
- Does she prefer platinum, yellow or white gold? Do you know?
- Does she prefer simple styles or would she prefer an engagement ring that will be instantly noticed?
- Do you know what kind of cut of stone she prefers?

By studying the kind of jewelery your bride-to-be (yes, that's what she'll become!) generally wears, you can find out a lot about her tastes. If she wears simple jewelery, this may be a sign that a diamond solitaire may be more appropriate than a flashy engagement ring carrying a cluster of gems.

Be aware of any jewelery she admires, especially engagement rings. If she appears to be particularly impressed by a certain ring, make a mental note of the cut and shape of the stone and the color of the gold.

The ring you choose should reflect her personality—she'll be wearing it for a long time, after all.

Read more about engagement rings from GroomGroove.com:

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While marriage is coommn to most cultures, the customs surrounding the ceremony vary greatly. For a Christian couple, the primary concern is not whether their wedding will fulfill all the expectations of local custom. (Romans 12:2) Rather, their paramount desire is to conduct their courtship and marriage in a way that brings honor to Jehovah God.—1a0Corinthians 10:31.Since marriage is an honorable arrangement, it is not something most couples would want to keep secret. In many Western lands, couples among Jehovah’s Witnesses coommnly arrange to be married in a ceremony at their local Kingdom Hall. Afterward, they may choose to hold a reception where they share a meal and possibly some entertainment with family and friends. Such occasions need not be elaborate. It must be admitted, though, that organizing a wedding and a reception is stressful and may entail considerable expense. For example, in the United States, wedding receptions often cost thousands of dollars.In an attempt to minimize stress and expense, some couples have chosen a more simple option. “We told our parents that we were not going to have a traditional wedding,” says Cindy, “because we wanted the occasion to be simple and inexpensive. My parents assured us that they understood our situation and sympathized with our concerns. They were very supportive.” On the other hand, when Cindy’s fiance9, Allen, mentioned earlier, told his parents their wedding plans, they found the decision difficult to understand. “They thought it was their fault,” says Allen, “that we made the decision because of something they had done. But that was definitely not the case.”Your parents too might be disappointed if you decide to have a very simple wedding, since they may want as many people as possible to share the joy of this special day. What, though, if you are thinking of getting married without even telling your parents because you know that your family would oppose the very idea of your getting married?Consider Your Family’s FeelingsIt may be that your parents would object because they feel that you are too young to make such an important decision. They may fear that your tastes will change as you mature and that you will soon regret your choice of marriage mate. Alternatively, they might consider you old enough to marry, but they see what they perceive as flaws in your loved one’s character. Or they may even forbid you to marry because your chosen partner does not share the same religious convictions as you.If your parents are true Christians, they likely have Bible-based reasons for their concerns. It is only right that they would express any misgivings they might have. Indeed, Jehovah would view them as negligent and unloving if they failed to do so. And it is in your interest to hear their point of view.—Proverbs 13:1,a024.To illustrate: When you buy an article of clothing, you likely seek someone else’s opinion as to whether the item suits you. You may not always agree with their opinion, but you would still expect close friends to tell you if they thought the garment was the wrong fit or style for you. You appreciate their comments, since they may help save you from wasting money. How much more so, then, should you appreciate hearing your family’s opinion about your choice of marriage mate. Although you can exchange or discard a garment, Jehovah expects you to keep your spouse for life. (Matthew 19:5,a06) If you choose a mate who is not really a complement of your personality and spirituality, the union will make you infinitely more uncomfortable than would wearing an ill-fitting garment. (Genesis 2:18; Proverbs 21:9) And as a result, you may miss out on a chance to find true happiness.—Proverbs 5:18; 18:22.
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Antique Engagement Ring Lady
Mon, Nov.14th 2011
As a person who sells antique engagement rings I would like to add that knowing her ring size is important. Also, spend what you can afford, the 2 months salary rule was invented by the industry. Giving the salesperson a price range is best. If you are shopping alone an going to surprise her, find out what the return policy is, just in case.
GIA Report
Tue, May.31st 2011
Thanks for this article--it's a great starting point for ring shopping. I would also recommend that you be sure you only consider purchasing diamonds that have been certified by a reputable lab like GIA. GIA developed the 4 C's grading system in the first place and they are known for their accuracy and strictness in grading. Having a lab report from GIA is crucial if you want to know exactly what you are buying!
Ricky N.
Sun, Jan.30th 2011
Good article! If I may add, it was really helpful for me to learn about grading certificates when I was ring shopping. It's such a big purchase and it's so important to know exactly what you're getting. From what I've learned through my whole (painstaking) shopping process, GIA has the strictest grading standards and the best reputation in the industry. I found their website helpful, especially in researching the 4 C's. www.gia4cs.gia.edu
Robert Gallagher
Sun, Nov.14th 2010
Good article. I cant stress the importance of doing your research before you buy an engagement ring or any diamond jewellery as it happens. There are so many price variations and different certificates. After doing alot of research we decided to go for a GIA certified diamond as they are the lab who invented the diamond grading system. All the most important diamonds in the world are graded by them as the GIA provide the most reliable and accurate grade. We bought our engagement ring from a specialist jeweller in Manchester http://www.giadiamondjewellery.com/ I bought a stunning ring for my partner for about 6.5K and it was valued by a totally independent valuer for 13K. Do your research its worth it. Regards Robert
Fri, Oct.22nd 2010
Good Articke, helpful for buyers. Also check more article onthe site. I bought mine on www.b2cjewls.com check the site as they have good styles.
Go to Diamond Scene!
Mon, Jul.19th 2010
Best store in New Yorks Diamond District. We came from Ireland and spent a couple days shopping for a ring. Even though we were recommended to another shop, Diamond Scenes friendliness, prices, and selection makes them a winner. Family owned and operated we dealt directly with the owners and their children. 9 West 47th Street. 646 366 8998. www.diamondscene.com **They were even featured in the New York Times! Well deserved!**
Mon, Jul.19th 2010
We were more than highly recommended to Diamond Scene through friends. Even though we were recommended we still took the time to research the store on the internet and we even checked some other stores. After purchasing our ring from Diamond Scene, we have recommended so many of our own friends who have been just as happy. The family that runs the store creates most of their clientele through recommendations, just like we did. They had the best price on the engagement ring I was looking for. I was very impressed with their selection and prices, better than bluenile!
Mon, Jul.5th 2010
Many prefer white gold to platinum because it can be sized and is less expensive for the same look. Fellas - if you purchase a white gold ring, ask if it contains nickel. It is not uncommon for someone to become allergic to nickel after prolonged exposure...either the whole ring contains the nickel alloy or the rhodium plating wears down and the nickel becomes exposed and your lady's finger may not be able to handle the ring unless it is replated in another metal. Not a purchase you want to chance your lady being allergic to!
Fri, Jun.25th 2010
Great thoughts and I would add that there are different rules for buying an engagement ring online. I wrote an article to help with that: http://www.danforthdiamond.com/how-to-buy-an-engagement-ring-online/
Vince K
Sun, Apr.11th 2010
Before you buy anything, check out Philip Press = www.platinumrings.com. Your wife is going to be wearing this thing for decades so go for the best quality. My fiance loves her ring that we bought here and I feel proud to have chosen a handcrafted ring that is the finest.
Wed, Mar.31st 2010
Excellent article. My husband definitely did a lot of researching about my tastes and about rings in general before we got engaged. To help couples get inspired by beautiful and unique engagement ring styles and settings, I started a blog - www.ringspotters.com. Another great place to start learning about rings and pricing is: http://www.pricescope.com/
Fri, Mar.26th 2010
Eh... The two-months-salary tradition was invented by diamond sellers. It doesn't even go back a whole century.
Sun, Nov.29th 2009
Edward James & Co. has the best prices on certified loose diamonds and makes the best quality engagement ring settings on the internet! - see for yourself at www.edwardjamesandco.com
Tue, Jul.28th 2009
Thanks for writing such a helpful guide - so many articles about this focus on only the diamond, but the metal is so important! After doing tons of research, I feel like platinum is the only choice... I really like that it is naturally white and won't require redipping all the time! And the durability is also a plus. Anyway, thanks again and good luck to everyone reading!
Mon, Jan.12th 2009
RichS!, I couldn't agree more. I am lucky to have my grandmother's diamond from her engagement ring. Really want my choice to reflect my girlfriend's personality, and I think she will love the sentimental quality of the stone. Was lost when it came to choosing a setting style and metal. I visited the site you recommended http://www.engagementguide.com and it was soooo helpful. The comparisons on ring settings and characteristics of metal were EXACTLY what I needed. Never knew the extent to which platinum outweighs other metals. My number one priority in my decision is wear, and platinum is a perfect metal for everyday wear as it loses little metal over time and will not tarnish.. (it actaully develops a matte shimmer women seem to love - it's patina) Great article, great site! Thanks so much!
Fri, Dec.19th 2008
This is a great article. I wish I had seen it before I had proposed to my girlfriend. Picking a diamond cut was the easy part for me because she told me exactly what she wanted. But picking the metal for the band really stressed me out. I knew nothing. I googled it and found this amazing site www.engagementguide.com and it had everything I could possibly need. After much research, I chose platinum for its obvious reasons (rare, pure and luxurious) but it is also hypoallergenic, which is good because other metals irritate my girlfriend's skin. When I proposed, my girlfriend loved the ring. She had clearly did her research and was impressed I had chosen the perfect ring, platinum band and all!
Mizrahi Diamonds
Thu, Nov.13th 2008
Heard about them they have a website www.MizrahiDiamonds.com My best friend brother in law bought an engagement ring from them. they are good!
Thu, Nov.13th 2008
Thank great article found a great jewelry store in downtown los angeles Mizrahi Diamonds anybody knows them ? they seem very honest.
Thu, Nov.6th 2008
I'm looking to propose soon and have looked everywhere for the perfect ring. Thanks to Mike's suggestion, I have an appointment with Tara in a week to look at possible rings and prices!
Sat, Sep.6th 2008
This article was my starting point, and thanks for the recommendation! I had a strict budget for the ring...and I didn't think I was going to be able to get what my fiance wanted for the amount I had. I called the place, For Richer or Poorer and got what she wanted at what I wanted to pay. Tara was patient, honest, and really gave us an education on what we were buying
Wed, May.14th 2008
I got that website wrong...The site is www.richer-or-poorer.com. Check it out, Tara's great to work with.
Thu, Feb.14th 2008
I got the ring from a New York based company that custom designs rings, and offers personal appointments - plus their prices beat everyone else. They walk you through the process, literally holding your hand all of the way! I got a 1.77ct diamond set in a platinum and diamond setting for $10,000. It got appraised for over $18,000! Check them out, ask for Tara. For-richer-or-poorer.com They can make anything you can think of.
Wed, Feb.6th 2008
As a grad student, its always important to get a deal living on a tight stipend, and get exactly what you want. I went with bluenile I got exactly what I wanted, for a price I was willing to pay. And the best part, it appraised over $3000 more then I paid for it. She was happy, I was happy and the ring was BEAUTIFUL.
wedding bound
Fri, Feb.1st 2008
If you're on a budget, try looking into CZ (Cubic Zirconia) engagement rings. My bride-to-be and I have good careers but decided that the diamond can come later on. We both went to the Jewelry District in Los Angeles and picked out a great engagement ring set with diamonds on the side and a CZ center stone at about 300.00. We are currently on our 2nd week of 3 weeks of planning and thought that the wedding getaway with close family and friends are first in point to pay for. Whether you're doing fast planning for a wedding or just on a budget, your bride-to-be wouldn't mind consider saving by getting a CZ stone to put more into the actual wedding. You have a whole lifetime after the wedding together to rightfully pick the stone of her choice.
Newbie at this whole ring jazz
Wed, Dec.19th 2007
Don\'t be afraid to go shopping with her at antique stores - you might find a real bargain and a design that you can\'t find anymore...I found a ring appraised at $3000 for $300 (!!!), and she loved it, it was a perfect fit from the get go...
Thu, Dec.13th 2007
good article. its hard to find "the right ring"...there are a lot of styles that i didn't actually see at stores when i popped that scary question haha! but really though, i gave her a mokume gane ring. really sweet work, check out www.georgesawyer.com thats where i got mine at..his work is incredible

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