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eloping [Page 1 of 2]

Eloping means to get married in a secretive manner - be it at city hall with a single witness or in Las Vegas at a 24-hour chapel with an Elvis impersonator. Believe it or not, there is etiquette on how to elope, and how to handle all the important people in your life who may feel spurned by being excluded. In addition, there are also some important issues you need to ask yourself before you run off and get hitched.

Will Your Immediate Family And Friends Be Hurt?
And if you think they will be hurt, how much do you care? The answer to this last question is the most important because, after all is said and done, it is your life and your marriage. That said, you may wish to avoid conflict by calling your parents before you make the big leap, just to let them in on the secret, like Britney Spears probably did. (ed. - What ever happened to her?) Or you may opt to leave them in the dark if you think that it would cause more harm than good. Some couples choose a modified, modern-day version of elopement: the destination wedding. The destination wedding allows you to invite your parents, siblings and closest friends without having to bear the financial burden of hosting a huge, extravagant wedding.

Can We Send Wedding Announcements?
Eloping, by definition, is a secret, unplanned, getaway wedding without anyone's consent. So, if you plan to tell everyone you just want to have a private ceremony, you're actually just having a non-traditional, destination wedding. Announcements are recommended, and gifts are acceptable.

You’ve Kept It A Secret – Now What?
If you’ve kept your elopement a secret, you may find it difficult (if not scary) to announce your marriage to your friends and family. There are several ways in which you can go about doing this.

Some couples send a formal announcement, while others throw themselves a casual "reception" or big party after they've returned from the elopement. You can also send an "At Home" card, which simply announces that the two of you are married and, as the name suggests, that you're home. If you choose to send an “At Home” card, don’t forget to include your new names and address, as well as a personal note explaining why you eloped.

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brave to be happy=)
Wed, Jul.20th 2011
Wow! I been with my boyfriend for half a year now we wanted to move in together, when we gave my family the news my mother burted into tears and said i dissapointed her, after all the drama my parents asked me to get married, I'm still at my parents and my still boyfriend says we will get marrird if i want but no family is invitef or even told anout us getting married,all because my mother insulted him about brainwashing me&that he comes from a bad family(they seem more united then my own). The point is that to elope might be my solution,because either way i don't family at my wedding I'm not even close to them, and what for if they see me as the blacksheep of the family. I might give them the ceremony just so thy won't feel neglected by their daughter.
Mrs. McClinton
Thu, May.19th 2011
I'm 18 and me and my boyfriend plan to elope instead of a full wedding because my family doesn't approve of me dating him. However they don't understand or take in consideration that were in love and want this. I don't know how to face my mother, let alone my family with this decision. I just kno they will hate me forever for making this choice, and I know my mother will stop all affiliation with us afterwards ..... what do I do, follow my heart or live life for my over protective family ???
Lady Jay
Wed, Feb.16th 2011
Im eloping in 1 month. No one knows. Ive been engaged to my partner for a year and a half. There will be no parents, relatives or friends. We both are very excited about our 15 minute wedding. The parents will be angry.. too bad it has nothing to do with them.
2nd Time Around
Wed, Nov.17th 2010
Announced the engagement but told all we didn't have a date picked. Booked a cabin in the mountains, arranged a minister to perform the ceremony on Friday at 1PM and off we go for the weekend - Thanksgiving is next week so family has been invited and will learn of our marriage then. It's about us, not anyone else...
Engaged one
Mon, Nov.15th 2010
Elope then come back throw a surprise party, make sure you taped the wedding vowles and have chapaigne and cake show the vid and all done, few tunes and your set!
Mon, Jul.5th 2010
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Wed, Jun.30th 2010
Your Comments I want to take advise about the elopement. please tell me some idea about this topic. thanks please
iona thomas
Wed, Jun.2nd 2010
hi...im from wales and need a visa to stay in england to finish my degree. i proposed to my friend snakes who has yet to reply. my main concern is my family and how they would react to me marrying such a sneaky snake so am thinking of eloping to vegas for the marraige. does anyone know if this marraige would be valid for my english visa? Also my friend from scotland is having the same issue, is there any other reptiles out there wanting to join us? let me know at iona_the_welsh_dragon@hotmail.co.uk. cheers.
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Tue, Apr.27th 2010
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Thu, Dec.31st 2009
My husband and I eloped after we started planning our wedding. We had a very private ceremony with just parents invited. Since we had already sent out our save the dates, we just sent out change of plan cards stating we got married. I wouldn't change it for anything. We had the wedding we both wanted and didn't have the stress of throwing a wedding other people would remember but yet had a wedding we would remember.
Sat, Dec.19th 2009
My now fiance and i have been dating for 4 years - we got engaged only a week or so ago and already the fuss and opinions from family & friends are starting to drive me crazy!! I want to elope - me, the love of my life, my best friend and his best friend on a beach in fiji......but he is not so keen and would rather a wedding with flowers n photos n guests n table decorations and a bitching bill at the end of it all. Im reluctant, but am going to give it a go. Fingers crossed it works out!!
Sun, Nov.29th 2009
i have been dateing my boy for 8 months and we wanna elope is it a good idea
Tue, Oct.27th 2009
i want to elope with my fiance to las vegas, but im not sure how much money we would need to save..can you help me out?
Sun, Aug.23rd 2009
i want to get married to my bf of 4 years do we have to be 18? or can we now? i love him so much and we want to be happy our parents dont want us to marry but yer
Tue, Jul.21st 2009
i want to elope but i don't know how i can convince my fiance for this.
Tue, Jun.16th 2009
Do you have to be at least 18 to be eloped or is it legal to be younger and get eloped to th love of your life??? I want to be with my boyfriend of 2 years but he is older than me and i am only 16. i want to marry him and he wants to marry me but, my parents wont give their consent. Can i elope to my other half as well as my best friend???
Brandon's Girl
Mon, Jun.8th 2009
My fiance and I are engaged we are young but still sure this is what we want to do, we are going to get eloped in about 6 months we will have been together almost 2 years by then, we are keeping it secret from our parents because they want us to wait a couple years (we are 18), our friends support us and they know it is going to happen but we want to make sure we can make marriage work before we have our "REAL" wedding... so elopement it is!
Wed, May.27th 2009
My husband and I recently eloped. However, we told our parents ahead of time. They are thrilled (we saved them so much stress and $). The wedding was amazing and thrilling. I will never forget it. I felt as though my bond with my husband is so much stronger now. We really shared a magical moment together and both of us are still on cloud nine. However, my bubble is starting to burst. It's time to send the announcements. We are only send ing about 50 or so out and we are going to include a photo from the ceremony. These announcements are simply what they are - announcements. I do not want anyone to think that we are "fishing for gifts." There is no mention of gifts in the announcement and we are not even including our return address on the envelopes (some people might try to send money). I think that is ok. My family and friends are freaking out because they want to see a photo and I figure actaully giving them one that they can scrapbook and sending an announcement is the nicest way to do that. Do you think I am handeling this situaton appropriately?
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Scared to death
Wed, Mar.25th 2009
I am to marry the love of my life in May this year. I want to elope. This is my second marriage. For some ridiculous reason my made of honor (older sister) I feel is planning her wedding not mine well that how I feel…… Any way we just want to get married without all the hassles. I just don’t know how to go about telling my loving yet over ruling sister that we are not going to have a wedding at her house but that we still would like to have the reception there. Help what do I say so she doesn’t get hurt or offended.
S&N Achilles
Thu, Mar.19th 2009
We did a semi-elopement in Yosemite last September. We compromised with our families by just having the immediate friends and family in attendance, then going to dinner at the hotel afterwards. In all we had about 20 people. All in all it was wonderful! Our friends kept raving about how beautiful it was and how perfect the ceremony was (we helped write our own!). However, when we got back we tried to plan a reception, but that got quickly out of hand. So we cancelled it, preferring to spend time with family individually and enjoy married life. Now we're looking into buying a house and it feels like our lives are really taking off!
Wed, Mar.11th 2009
A few lessons from when we eloped back in November... Make sure you do something memorable - we got married on South Beach and it was amazing. It cost very little in reality, and left us with some incredible memories. Also, plan how to break the news. People will be surprised (especially family), but we made sure that we put up a nice photo album online really fast, so people could see how happy we were. That helped them feel like part of it. (You can see it at www.WeJustEloped.com and you can do the same there as well). Finally, we surprised a couple of friends by inviting them for a 'celebration' but not telling them what was going on. Having them there gave us a really nice party afterwards and really made the day special. Thanks Dan and Kirby!
Fri, Feb.27th 2009
My sister who is 7 years younger than me is getting married and our parents are going all out and throwing her a huge wedding. My father keeps pressuring me to get married because I'm getting old and my boyfriend will not love me anymore when I get old. My boyfriend and I love each other and have discussed that we want to spend our lives together but it has only been a year and we dont have the money. My father treats the whole thing as just wanting to get rid of me so I dont have to be a financial burden on him anymore (i'm mostly independent). He has ruined the whole thought of marriage for me and taken the romance out of it. I want to elope, but my boyfriend's family is traditional and would be very offended. (mine would just be glad to be rid of me). How can we do this without making it about my father's demands on me???
Wed, Feb.25th 2009
i want to elope at 18 but my boyfriend is worried about how my family will feel he is older then me so he wories about alot more
Martha Stewart wedding fan
Mon, Jan.12th 2009
I was initially sad to be eloping; my fiance and I have been together for 11 years and have been engaged for nearly two. Yet with student loans after finishing our degrees as well as saving for a down payment on our house, we figure eloping is our only option. I think we'll have a small destination wedding, which will at least give me the chance to have some close relatives there. The only challenge for me is keeping the big secret...
Mon, Jan.5th 2009
Yeah I elope 2.
Mon, Dec.22nd 2008
My fiance and I want to elope because at the first mention of what was supposed to be a small, intimate ceremony, our families took over and we watched our casual plans snowball out of control. I could not imagine spending tons of money so that OTHER people can celebrate our union. It's about us, not them. I can't begin to understand how my parents and his parents will feel about being "left out". They can all whine about it together at the "congratulations" party after the actual marriage. I don't really want to be secretive about it, but no one else is going to plan our wedding, so we removed the opportunity for any of that mess.
Thinking about eloping
Fri, Nov.14th 2008
My fiance and I have always talked about eloping to Venice, Italy and after 3 years we've decided to just do it. We are getting married April 1st, April Fool's Day! We are planning to send out announcements that will arrive in our friend's and family's mailboxes on April 1st, so they'll be left wondering whether we are actually getting married or whether it's a joke! We love it. We thought it was only fair to break it to our parents, my mother did not take it well. She's very upset that she is being "cheated" out of seeing her only daughter get married. We've always been close, and now I just feel bad that she feels bad. I've considered telling our parents and immediate family that if they want to make the journey to Venice that they're more than welcome to come, however, I really honestly just want a small intimate and romantic ceremony at the church we've booked in Venice with just me and my fiance. I want it to be just about us, not trying to coordinate family members who have never traveled outside of the country. Any suggestions?
Tue, Nov.11th 2008
Eloping puts some fun back into a relationship. It's spontaneous and for some it is unexpected. It give the couple the thrill of defying the norm. I'm currently engaged and since we've had a longer engagement than most we've had more time to think about things, and don't think we haven't thought about eloping. I'm sure most couples do. It looks like a solution to the struggle of putting together all the decorations and arrangements. Not to t mention the cast difference. Over all, I think that having a larger wedding with all our friends and family will lead to a longer and stronger emotional attachment for the both of us.
Waiting for him
Mon, Nov.3rd 2008
My fiance is in Iraq, finishing this never-ending tour. We are eloping when he returns and renting a cabin in the mountains for our "honeymoon". We get to be stress free and fun and be ourselves without the facade of making everyone else happy. We will tell everyone, mostly because they have to know. Then we are having a...well..whatever it ends up being..mini wedding? reception? party type thing a few months after the fact to have everyone feel involved and get better acquainted and just have fun. I could care less how it happens so long as we are together. That's what it's about anyway...no ring or paper or 100 people or amount of money, dresses, flowers, and whatnot can tell me what is or isn't real...if we are going to be forever, it starts when we want it to. And it should be all about us and what we want, not what our families want...it's not their marriage.
Wed, Oct.1st 2008
my and my, now, wife eloped this monday... it was awesome! i came here because except for my parents and brother and a few select cousins... i still have to announce it to the world and co-workers.... lol. great article... as for the celebration, we will be doing a sunday brunch in one of the following weekends once we know everyone that's anyone can make it. good luck to you all!
Wed, Aug.6th 2008
Does anyone know how long we should wait to throw a party after we get back from our elopement???? My fiance and I are planning on eloping, and would like to throw a cocktail party for friends and family, upon our return. Our idea is that we would send out the invites while we are gone....saying...."By the time you read this we will be married...please join us for a party on such and such day to celebrate our news with us". I'd like to wait a few months, to give people a chance to RSVP and plan accordingly, but...If too much time passes after we elope, will it still be something to celebrate? Or will it be old news by then? Any thoughts?
Tue, Jul.29th 2008
My fiance and I are planning our elopement, we want to celebrate with friends and family when we get back from our trip, but we're not sure about all the etiquette involved. So far our family and friends know about our plans and no one is upset...well, not really!
happy bride
Tue, Jul.22nd 2008
So true Mrs CMF. We did it earlier this year and it's one of the best things we ever did. The people who genuinely care for us are just happy that we are happy. We had one extended family member have a go at us but that just made us feel better about what we did because we shouldn't sway to please relatives that are never happy anyway. We had a great day together that we will always remember and it really reinforces the intimacy of our decision to marry. It's up to the couple what kind of day they will have and anyone who respects you will respect your decision.
Thu, Jul.3rd 2008
My husband and I eloped last month and I couldn't be happier with our decision. People seem to get caught up in the glitz of a big expensive wedding but that wasn't what was important to us. We got married because we love eachother not because we wanted to waste $20,000 on a day that we would spend with 150 other people.
Lynne Weinstein
Tue, Jun.24th 2008
My husband and I had the perfect elopement almost three years ago. We live in Maine and "planned" our elopement with a Rabbi at the Princess Wedding Chapel in Las Vegas. We booked a few shows for the weekend, stayed at the Mirage and just made lots of plans for our marriage weekend. The morning after our beautiful private ceremony, we called our parents and children (We were in our late 40's, 2nd marriage for both of us)Nobody even knew we were away for the weekend! They were shocked and thrilled, then we had a beautiful wedding reception in South Florida where we had both lived previously, 5 months after the wedding. Our ceremony and wedding day were picture perfect. It was all about "us' and no stress, but just lots of excitement and affordable. ROMANCE at it's best actually!If we pissed any family members off, they got over it! If we could do it over again, we'd do it the same way,absolutely no regrets about eloping...plus it makes a wonderful story to share!
Wedding Bound
Fri, Feb.1st 2008
My fiancee and I are currently in week 2 of the three week wedding planning. IT would be considered a cross between eloping and destination wedding. We have chose to invite cousins from her side of the family and cousins and sibling from my side of the family because we wanted a more intimate wedding but with the people we have grown up with. It is very much exciting to hold such a big secret but also conluded as alittle more appropriate to elope because we are with family. We don't feel like the rest of our families will be so left out after the fact, only because they know the kind of bond we have with each of our cousins and siblings.
Fri, Dec.14th 2007
sounds more badass than regular marriage haha
Fri, Nov.30th 2007
I want to elope but my girlfriend is a bit more conservative.

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