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A Gift from the Groom to his Bride
[Page 1 of 1] "Just get your ass to the church on time!" she tells you. By now, an educated groom knows that there's much more to weddings than that. Sure, you've got your tuxedo and you might have even made an appointment for your first professional shave to look your absolute best on the big day. But perhaps the most important thing of all is a gift for your true partner in crime (and in life)--your bride. Huh??? "Hold on just a second," you might be thinking. The groom is on the hook for yet another wedding-related purchase? This might even be the first you're hearing about a gift from you to your bride-to-be, and hopefully it's not too late. Many men from a wide range of backgrounds and experiences are oblivious to this custom. Even after all the clams you've shelled out for that tux, gifts for the groomsmen, the dance lessons (that's right - dance lessons), the honeymoon and the forty-seven other things on the checklist, your bride and possibly even her more traditional mother might also be expecting you to present her with something else to help commemorate that special day. (ed. -- This wedding thing can be a total circus, we know.) If you're lucky, your bride will think this tradition is ridiculous and would prefer you spent the money on a personal trainer for yourself (no hint there, groom.) That said, regardless of the tradition, here's what to consider. The Tradition First, your bride might not even know that you are "supposed" to give her a gift. Then again, if you choose to forego a gift for her, you might be getting your marriage off on the wrong foot, especially if you're about to gain a hard to please, or very traditional mother-in-law. In an interview with GroomGroove.com, recent bride, Helen M.,of New York City, was told by her mother that, traditionally, the bride should be given a pearl necklace. (Hint, Hint). Helen's groom, Stephen, said "I basically refused to succumb to the tradition because it should be my choice." On one hand, Stephen is correct; gift-giving should be optional and a personal choice. But, on the other hand, when Stephen did present Helen with a strand of beautiful pearls with a jeweled clasp on the morning of their wedding, she "cried so much that she had to re-do her makeup," he reports. Sure, many grooms make their brides and mothers-in-law cry on the blessed day, but the kind of tears Helen shed are the kind of result you're after. This is especially true if she, like Madonna before her, is a material girl. Grooms! Know your bride... It seems like such a simple point: you're getting married. You know your bride, right? But if she's not a traditionally-minded bride, she might react the way recent bride, Julia D., of Ann Arbor, Michigan did. Julia readily admitted that although it might have flown in the face of tradition and it might not even seem romantic to some, her bride's gift was "way better than a silly pair of earrings". Julia and her groom were headed to Italy for their honeymoon, and her future husband gave her a leather jacket as a wedding gift. A practical gift for some, but Julia says "whenever I wear the jacket, I think about our time in Florence." In her mind, it was a perfect gift and an even better memento of their wedding and honeymoon than earrings or a necklace at the bottom of her jewelry box. This just might be a chance to really shine, like this husband-to-be did. One groom "tracked down a valuable and nostalgic book - the same exact copy - that I sold in my leaner years to make rent" said bride Jen K., who was married in July 2007. That groom really took the time to listen to his bride-to-be. That kind of gift is the sort that can keep right on giving all the way past the wedding day and towards a very happy marriage. [Page 1 of 1]------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
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Jennifer
While I was in my Bridal suite, my fiancee' had the most beautiful crystal card given to me. The inscription were his words, and it totally made me cry. He got it at www.eliteglasscards.com. We got one for my Mom's birthday a couple of months later.
John
LMAO Mike you are right. He is an Idiot, Be a gentleman about things. Something like that is privet gift.
john
go with something from tiffany's or you could also get one of those roses dipped in gold....you can get them for less than 100......i myself just bought my soon to be wife a $5000 necklace and will get her something from tiffany's and also a rose.......good luck with your gift search, always remember the price isnt what matters, it should just come from the heart and you wont go wrong.
a really unique gift for your bride, check out www.girlygifties.com under 'gettin hitched'... this biz ships to canada and the usa. if your bride is into girly, pin-up, tattoo images, retro stuff then this might be thing for you.
april24th bride
I have no idea what Im getting from my groom but I am getting him a Glock40 cal he has wanted one for a while and like the article says you need to know your bride/groom and be practical but I am also getting him a pocket watch with a picture of him and his pap that passed away engraved in it!
J
should you give a gift at the wedding shower??? I am days away?
Mitch Cumstein
She says she will be giving me a blumpy, so I guess to be fair I should give her an Alaskan snow dragon.
Mike
Gordy, your an idiot.
1. for posting a comment like that &
2. for posting a comment like that and having no clue what you are talking about. Try googling next time junior.
Andy
Amanda, any way you can call my fiancee and give her the idea of a remodeled studio room? That is the most kick ass gift idea I've heard of! :-)
birdetobe
I agree with Debbie, I'm 22 and getting married and this article has given me some ideas of what to get for my husband for our wedding day. I know it was aimed at the FH for the FB but its given me some ideas. I had started to sketch a picture of him to frame as I used to do Art in school, but since I started it he's had his long hair cut short and it wasn't as good as I would have liked anyway. I very much agree that it should be something practical or something that reflects the personality of the person you are buying for. From my point of view it doesn't have to be expensive after all the money that goes into the wedding- for me a simple silver photo frame with a small engraved message would suit me perfectly.
Gordy
I will be giving her a "PEARL NECKLACE" if you know what i mean ;-)
(FOR THE OLDER GENERATION- A PEARL NECKLACE IS A NAME GIVEN TO ANAL BEADS- WHICH ARE A PLASTIC/ GLASS SET OF INTERCONNECTED BEADS WHICH INCREASE IN SIZE AND ARE INSERTED IN THE FEMALE RECTUM) OR MALE RECTUM AS THE NEWER GENERATION ARE BEGINNING TO DO!
Thinkalittle
We decided we're spending enough on everything else and agreed to make each other's gifts. now don't go imagining all cheap stuff. We're both creative and very detail oriented. I'm a graphic designer and started keeping a journal when we first started dating cause I could tell things were different. So for her gift i'm rewriting it all in a custom made journal book about 'our adventure' with space for more 'when we get there'.
Think outside of the box people. Are guys really so unoriginal that they have to look at a site to get ideas about what their wife would like? Get to know HER! Screw tradition. Tradition started cause that's what they wanted way back when. Get to know what they want NOW.
john joe junior
Your Comments she should be happy enough she got me!!! she won in all fairness
JonEgypt
uh huh. other than sneakers(choff-gag) and pearl neclaces whats good?
Jamie
My fiancee and I are getting married in December. I wanted to do something subtle that would always remind us of our special day. I bought a sterling silver Christmas tree topper and had it engraved. "May our days be merry and bright..." I slipped a piece of rolled paper inside the star with our anniversary date and a message to our future children/grandchildren/great grandchildren...I hope it will be in our family forever.
Jenn
My fiance' really loves Penn State football. I got him a nice Penn State watch and got the back of it engraved. I think he'll love it. When we went to Vegas last year I went in Tiffany's and was torn between two different necklaces. He told me right then he was going to buy the other for me for the wedding...it was the Tiffany "blue box" charm...he said it can be my something blue for the wedding and he knows I love Tiffany! It was a great idea by him!
Rob
I agree, know your bride to be. The gift I had chosen for my wife didn't take much time at all. I thought about something that she will keep, something practicle as well as something that will always remind her of the wonderful wedding we had. I went to a jewler and had him make a small double heart pendant necklace. They are inexpensive around 120 dollars. On the top of one heart l had her birthstone and on the other was mine. We had been married now (very happily) for 5 years and every once in awhile I will catch her looking at it and watch her smile.
Dave
im broke, what should i do?
Brad
Since my finace and I are getting married in the catholic church, and our wedding is VERY VERY Traditional, I decided for her gift and really our gift is to get a Papal Blessing that you can arrange through youre Archdiocese. The best one costed me $80.50 and it will grace our home forever. Its beautiful and will last a lifetime. Something special outside of normal "gifts"
Rogier
I will give her a watch!
She realy wants to have it for a very long time, but never wanted to spent the money on it. We're going to get married in italy 11th sep. 2011 at Lake Garda.
We arranged a wedding planner over there, saves us a lot a work!
This is not helpful, I thought you were actually selling gifts not just ideas!!!
Sonya
i'm going to be getting marries in 2 years. yes i know that sounds like a long time, but it takes alot of planning considering he wants to plan most of it. i told him i wanted a beach wedding 2 yrs. ago and he was planning our wedding before we started dating! i feel lucky to have him in my life. and pearls are the last thing i want from him. his love and being with him is all i need¢¾
Adam
I got my wife a pair of custom Nike sneakers in pink/camo with Mrs. **** on the heels from the NikeID website. Her mom and her aunts all thought they were awesome. She LOVES them, too.
She didn't want/need a gift and we are both non-traditional people, but I wanted her to have these and she wears them on rare occasions so that she doesn't wear them out.
That said, I believe couples should give gifts from the heart and with their beloved's needs, wants, and desires in mind. My wife loved these shoes because I picked them out for her with her in mind and because they had her new name and title on them.
Groom to be
Oh she will be getting a pearl necklace on the wedding night, but I am also getting her a gift.
Amanda
I'm 20, my FH is 22. I'm not sure what he's getting me, or if he's getting me anything...but I don't mind regardless. Its sappy, but I'm happy I'm getting HIM. I decided, because he loves music, that I will remodel the basement of our new house (we finalize in two weeks, a month before the wedding) into a studio for him. Its not cuff links, or a coat, but I'm a designer...so it means more to him because he'll have his own "spot" that I was able to give to him.
Jon will never read this article again...but I think for everyone else, you can benefit from his ignorance.
sue
Pearls mean TEARS, So I DON'T WANT ANY...JUST GET ME A LOVELY DIAMANTE NECKLACE PLEASE XX
Ashley
My fiance keeps asking me what i want for our wedding, he has made it very clear that he wants a new Bow to go hunting with... yes I will soon be a deer hunters widow but I have no clu what to tell him. he gets me jewlary all the time so that would be just another gift I want something cute and romantic but i don't know waht to tell him!
ummm....
calm down people... there's a reason its called tradition. people feel a connection in doing it so they DECIDE to do it. whether or not you personally want to do it is YOUR decision (as said above). And there are other traditions... like not having cakes, being enviromentally friendly, or changing out of your dress at the reception. not to mention inserting a "fun dance" into a yawn-worthy slow dance. : ) Wedding are meant to celebrate the individuality of the couple themselves. in doing this, you will know how it should go.
deez
I give my fiance pearl necklaces all the time (ha!)
This video says it all
http://www.comedycentral.com/videos/index.jhtml?videoId=217479&title=timing-de-veers-diamonds
MrsWooldridge
Jon, I feel sorry for you. First of all, being of the younger generation (I'm 26), I'm a COMPLETE traditionalist. I'm not going to be upset if my fiancee doesn't get me something for our wedding. He's basically paying for the majority of the wedding himself. However, he's a traditionalist as well, and really enjoyed this article. I think this particular read has EVERYTHING to do with the younger generation. It teaches us the value of tradition. We start our own traditions based off of those that have been cherished and handed down through the centuries. I'm even excited about my family's Scottish plaid being incorporated into our wedding...its a 500-year-old tradition. So, as for taking it a step further? Why don't YOU get creative? It takes creativity and individuality to take an old tradition, put a younger twist on it, and still have it recognizable as traditional. So speak for yourself when you're talking about turning the younger generations away. I happen to favor the romantic fairy-tale, thank you very much! That's a perfect opportunity for creativity.
I wonder how many brides get pearl necklaces on their wedding night?
My husband got me a pearl necklace as a wedding gift which I wore on my wedding day and I've cherished and worn over and over again for the 9 years we've been married. Any type of strand of pearls or even a set (necklace, bracelet and earrings) will never go out of style and is sure to be the most special gift she'll receive. It can be her "something new" for her to wear with her wedding dress or her rehearsal attire. Down the road she can pass it along to your daughter as her "something old" for her own wedding. There are reasonably priced sets out there too. Go to http://www.silverlandjewelry.com/Bridal-Jewelry-Sets.html
groom-to-be
nice! i thought it would be nice to get her a little something, and this confirms it!
K
SO if this article sucks and doesn't give the viewpoint of the younger generation how about you stop complaining and give your opinion of that younger generations viewpoint. Stop complaining about the article and put something forth more so then "this sucks". Either provide some information for a solution or STFU.
Mac
Jon, Exactly what traditions have the younger generation given us. Oh I know starting a food fight with the wedding cake, and setting the Brides dress on fire. Yeah really cool.
29th Infantry
This is the first I have ever heard of this tradition, but I sure am happy I read about it. I always find myself feeling like my bride to be has two full plates while I pause the Xbox for a min when she asks me a question. Of course that isn't how it really is, but I feel that a gift given to the bride to be on the morning of the wedding is just what she earned after planning the wedding for the last year. I will be sure to let you know how the gift goes!
william
i found the article very helpful. it is nice to see the traditional point of view. It helps quite a bit. As for people saying the younger crowd is creative, we can't be too creative since we have to read articles to get ideas and information
Debbie
Jon, maybe YOU should write the article for the new generation. And what would it say, I wonder? Dump the tradition of gift-giving entirely? Give your bride-to-be something you picked up at the last second? Make sure it's something she's really going to hate?
Seriously, you need a lesson in manners. For one, the article was very clear that TRADITIONALLY, jewelry is the gift of choice for many couples. However, it was also EXPLICITLY clear that there are plenty of couples choosing to go a different route. The leather jacket and the book, for example. So you have traditional gifts and non-traditional gift examples. What else could you be looking for?
My FH and I are all about "starting new traditions," as you call it. However, there's only two ways to start: one is to take a completely blank slate and design something brand-new. If this is your preference, then what the heck are you doing on this website? Go get a piece of paper and do your own thing. You don't need an article to tell you what to do.
The second option, which I believe this article is assisting with, is to provide couples with enough options to get them started. From there, you can decide what fits, what doesn't, and what can be modified. But you have to start from somewhere.
FYI, my FH and I are very much a part of that "younger" generation, but we certainly don't insult a writer simply because their article was not helpful enough for us. We either deal, or we move on. Don't give our generation a bad name just because you can't be satisfied.
Jon
Your article is really lacking in the web 2.0 aspect and you have completely turned away your younger generations. Your article only gives info on a traditional wedding and then touts gifts that fly against tradition. Take it a step farther as today's younger generation is much more creative and much less focused on old tradition as they are focused on starting new traditions.
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